Well yeah ... It has been a few months since my last post on this blog ... And yes, I am mad as hell 'coz of the Covid-19 pandemic ... I haven't been able to watch any movie at the cinema for a few months now and will never be able to watch any movie for at least a few months from now because all cinemas are on lockdown ... I ranted about it on my other blog but with little success, I think ...
I think the lockdown has taken away my gift for writing inane, nonsensical, bagful of witty ironicism on both blogs ... I just don't seem to care anymore ... It's like my life has ran its course and I'm just standing in front of a large never-ending wall of despair, unable to climb over to continue to the next path in my life ...
I wish there was something I had to say, something I had to let out from my chest, but alas, no such thing ... I just don't have anything to say ... Maybe it's got to do with my age ... I mean, I'm 46 and what I got to show for it? ... I also wonder If my life is going to be this way for the next 20 years, God-willing, if I still continue to live for the next 20 years ... I don't have friends and I'm lonely, I'm in a dead beat job and no future anywhere else ... I just don't know what I should do ... When it comes to my career, I have accepted the fact that I am stuck with the dead beat job ... I have resigned to the fact that no one will hire someone who are in the their late 40s and who has jumped from job to job with frequency ... As for loneliness, I guess my new friends are the co-workers where I work, though I don't consider them as my friends except for one or two ...
This is why I haven't updated my blogs for some time ... What is there to write about when one's life has come to a full stop and she's not dead? ...
I'm mad as hell that Brainjuice can't put any words of witty ironicism in my mouth and the fact that she struggles with it shows how maddening Life is!!!
No comments:
Post a Comment