Art by Dave Walker
Well, my life is pretty boring these days ..... So, the other day, somebody invited me to be on their FB list ..... Some time ago, I was invited by another friend, but never bothered to accept .... Hmm, some friend, huh? ....
So, when I saw this new invite, I thought, oh well, there's no avoiding it then .... So, I took what was to me one giant leap, but a short click of the mouse away for the rest of Planet Earth ....
The thing is, it's not that I find the idea of Social Networking repulsive ... not in the least bit at all .... You should see me in action on YM .... Well, that was some time ago, I've hung up my hat and taken the bullet for all the 'action' ..... It's just the idea that I have to put up all my bits and pieces on one, er, homepage when I've strung out like a gazilion thousand words on two separate blogs, why do I need a networking site for? ....
Isn't it really bad, enough to induce permanent comatose, to read all that stuff I've written on my blogs, all just about me? Yeah, it is, Brainjuice .... I mean, c'mon, who reads your blogs anyway, other than your loyal friends? .... Do I have such a megalomaniac personality that I need to use more webspace only to add f**k-ugly facts and farting fancies about my self? ....
But FB is pretty much unlike, well, MySpace, for example .... You don't really have to fill in a lot on your profile ..... the Applications add the personal touch to that ..... Hmmm .... FB also stands for fuck buddy, right? ...
Updated 11/10/2013 - Somehow, fook buddy doesn't sound right ... It sounds like he's trying to penetrate you, fumbled, and ended up saying "fook" instead ... No going around, f**k buddy as a term stands, even though I will no longer use the rather harsh description for sexual intercourse as a swear word ...
Updated 30/12/2016 – No, I will not stop dropping F-bombs, at least where my blogs are concerned ... And Fook can be a Chinese surname for all I know ... So F**K is the official written swear word of Brainjuice, next to SHIT ...
.... Well, where the hell is he? (He's out there waiting for you to find him, J, be patient, God makes everything in pairs, except of course you can't just have sex with him, you guys have to get married first) .... I could use some right now (yes, I know how you feel, me being you ... Patience ... Good things come to those who wait ... Have complete faith) .... Yeah, I mean like, right this minute (Not gonna happen, okay) ...
Okay, going back to this social networking stuff ...Right, I was hooked on the apps .... They have cool apps .... like what sort of farter you are, and see who has the most earwax among you and your friends .... You know, things like that ..... and I begin to realize that is not about just you, but you and your friends sharing cool stuff and bug each other out with more and more apps invites .... omigod, like .... duh ....
Updated 11/10/2013 - Somehow, fook buddy doesn't sound right ... It sounds like he's trying to penetrate you, fumbled, and ended up saying "fook" instead ... No going around, f**k buddy as a term stands, even though I will no longer use the rather harsh description for sexual intercourse as a swear word ...
Updated 30/12/2016 – No, I will not stop dropping F-bombs, at least where my blogs are concerned ... And Fook can be a Chinese surname for all I know ... So F**K is the official written swear word of Brainjuice, next to SHIT ...
.... Well, where the hell is he? (He's out there waiting for you to find him, J, be patient, God makes everything in pairs, except of course you can't just have sex with him, you guys have to get married first) .... I could use some right now (yes, I know how you feel, me being you ... Patience ... Good things come to those who wait ... Have complete faith) .... Yeah, I mean like, right this minute (Not gonna happen, okay) ...
Okay, going back to this social networking stuff ...Right, I was hooked on the apps .... They have cool apps .... like what sort of farter you are, and see who has the most earwax among you and your friends .... You know, things like that ..... and I begin to realize that is not about just you, but you and your friends sharing cool stuff and bug each other out with more and more apps invites .... omigod, like .... duh ....
Hmmm, well, welcome to the 21st century of making friends ..... One day, we're going to have friends who are just computer interfaces .... we never meet these people, in fact, we have avatars for that who would do all the friendship bonding for us ..... In fact, the relationship is so real, that, .... like, it was discussed in an edition of TIME in early 2007, 'kay, so go read that ..... 'coz I'm just another faceless hack who's just trying to say the obvious ....
In the mean time, I'll try to dodge as many apps invites as possible, thereby making me unpopular and uncool, and possibly, be taken out of the list of the very few friends that I have ..... hmmm, the pressure ....... But nothing, no amount of technology could ever re-create the feeling of a warm bear hug of a cherished close friend :) ....
... Just wanna add that I've had my FB account for some time now, but the fuck buddy still hasn't turned up .... (He will, God-willing, except he's going to be your husband who will love and cherish you and not only want to have just mind-numbing intercourse with you, okay?)
Updated 22/02/2009 - Well, there's been quite a lot of FB dissenters lately, what with the latest f**k-up (no other version of f**k-up will adequately deliver the same meaning with enough loath and apathy, so f**k-up will remain f**k-up) on its new Terms of Use ... And then about the latest craze on that 25 Random Things about Whatever .... I actually never had a look at the new ToU before it was taken down, and yes, I've been tagged with that 25-random-thingamajig ....
Can I simply point out something? When one enters into an agreement, a law-binding one at that, I am pretty sure there is a clause that says something to the effect, that of the party you sign for, hereby can, and will, change their terms and conditions of use, in whatever manner they deem fit, as befitting the nature of their business ... The thing is, for me, I don't bother reading all these legal literature, 'coz they're a headache to understand ... I know, and am fully aware, of the dangers of doing such a thing ... But you know what, I just take my chance, and clicked the box next to the disclaimer "I understand the Terms of Use" ... The thing is, do you actually think a lot of people out there bother to read the Terms of Use of anything? ... Some people do, and rightly so .... I'm not one of those people ....
And I don't bother doing the 25 Random Things You Ought To Know About Me .... Like I've said, in this post, I have my two blogs to do that for me .... I had a look at an example, though ... It's kind of interesting ...
What I'm more concerned with, is the crime that can be perpretrated through these social networking sites - child molesters targetting young victims, for instance ... That, to me, is a much more immediate and important issue ... Bear in mind, though, Facebook has been used in law enforcement to solve crimes ... Below are some links to help people understand these issues:
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